"Tragedy of Commons"

I am reading an article in Surfer magazine called "Localism Doesn't Work" and it struck a chord with me.

Basically, the writer (Brad Melekian) quotes Garrett Hardin's paper written in 1968 called "The Tragedy of Commons." The gist of it is that "individuals, motivated purely by their own self interest, will inevitably destroy a commonly held resource."

I've always been bothered by people who aren't aware of their surroundings. These are the fuckers who drive like they are the only ones on the road, or the ones who walk through the mall, oblivious to what's going on around them (like the fact they are moving at a pace about half of everyone else, creating a logjam of folks trying to get by them). Or these fuckers who won't let you merge; we all got places to be what fuck is 10 seconds to me in a ahead of you?

These people I call selfish. There is a common good. Now, I don't believe in total self sacrifice, but I believe in a balance. I look for and respond to people who are aware that there is something besides themselves in this world. If we shared equally, then all would be good. I realize that. And I would make that sacrifice, if everyone did it. Yeah, I could set the example, but I got a family to feed and a mortgage to pay. I am not Ghandi. But I want to be with these people who recognize that.

And I as I write this, I realize this might sound like socialism, but it's not. I believe in pulling your weight.

My dad, when I was a kid, used to say "I should be President" and I though, Dad, you pompous prick how you can say that. But now I get it. He always thought if everyone thought like he did......

I love my Dad. I wouldn't be where I am today without him. I attribute all my success in life to him.

The Road

I am reading The Road by Cormac McCarthy. I don't know why I picked this book to read. I read No Country for Old Men before I saw the movie. It was a good book. It was like a narrative to me. It was like someone was reading a narrative of each of these peoples lives that were intertwined. Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed the book, but it was very blunt, very minimalistic, and to me, very "ordinary", ordinary in the sense it was descriptive in the sense it was the day to day activity of these characters, except they were hiding money and killing folks (thinking of Pulp Fiction). For me, McCarthy is to literature what Quentin Tarantino is to film. That's the best analogy I have. Most folks have seen Tarantino films. Both, at the interpersonal level, are very gritty, very real. That's why I like it so much (McCarthy and Tarantino)

The Road is a post apocalyptic story. A man and his young son are making their way and surviving. I've read some pretty rough reviews of this one, but as I read it, I don't consider the lack of quotation, or the sparse dialogue, I consider how the story makes me feel, and it's one of fierce love (a father for his son), and a bleak, desperateness, against all odds. For me, and I think it's because I have a son (or children), I can empathize with what the main character feels, and the setting doesn't matter. And that's what makes me want to read on and on in this one. For me, the story is this father's love for his son, and the desperation he feels trying to protect his son from the horrors of this new world. Gut wrenching. I guess that's why I would consider it well written, because of the emotions it pulls from me.. But I would never recommend it to anyone who doesn't have children. I don't think they would get it. And who knows, I don't even know if McCarthy has kids, but he writes a decent story.

Spent the last 3 days in the greater LA area. How I would love to live in Southern California. There are some beautiful municipalities/cities in the the LA area. And it's awesome, the weather, the diversity. The people are really nice, too. I enjoyed it. I'd like to take my wife out there and dispel her preconceive notions that it's crazies, pushers and prostitutes on every corner. I even went down to East LA. That place is fascinating, all the shops and storefronts. It's was awesome.

I did not get a chance to surf. I did get a cold. Flying back was not as bad as I thought, but it was still uncomfortable.

I was happy to be with my family again.

"So...."

I realize my last four posts start with "So." So? Maybe SO..... ha. WTF ever.

So anyway, I watch LFC play Fulham today, abysmal. I don't know what has happened with them. Possibly Benetiz has lost the plot? speculation abounds. I want LFC to lift the EPL title. I don't care about the rest, just the EPL title. Looks like Rafa is playing for Champions League. Don't know. It's Halloween, I've been drinking. Right now, just thinking about that. Nothing deep, nothing probing. Just football.

So it's been almost a month and a half since my last blog. A lot has happened, and nothing has happened. It's like it's all busy work, our lives, living them out, pretending we know why we are doing it. I guess if you are Christian, like my wife, this isn't vexing at all for you. I am Agnostic. My actions have to have purpose, pragmatic purpose. Day to day, with all the little things that happen, sometimes it's overwhelming. Not overwhelming really, but it really makes me start questioning everything. Our purpose in life, why we are here, what my focus should be, etc.

I had a really interesting lunch with a friend of mine a week or so ago, and he got off on this whole thing based off of an experience with an illness and some antibiotics that where prescribed to him. It was great, listening to him talk about it. Anyway, he had an out of body (out of universe?) experience (not really, it was more a dream) which kind of put a lot of things in context for him, about how insignificant we are and how it is so totally egotistical and presumptuous to even consider we are the only life forms in the universe. And it ultimately came back around to religion, because it assumes so much and always talks about about how things are because the Bible says so, or God or Jesus says so. The bible was written by men, hundreds of years after Jesus was gone... but that's another blog (rant).

It was a good talk, because a lot of what he said I felt the same about. What I learned, studying Philosophy, was how little I know, and how little we could ever know about the cosmos, and the possibility of life of on other planets, and creation, etc. That's why I am Agnostic. And it's also why I am looking into Existentialism...........

So. It's been a while. Denver came and went. Things went well there, conversion went smoothly for the most part. I had dinner with my biological aunt, and it's always interesting when I meet up with my biological family members. It makes me wonder "where would I be if I hadn't been adopted?" It also makes me glad I was (and I apologize if any of them were to read this, but I think I could justify that, feelings aside).

I have been home with the kids all weekend. Wife is off on a getaway with old friends from high school. It's been a roller coaster, dealing with the kids(edited to remove anything that could even be remotely considered incriminating. We spank our children, but we don't beat them. But some folks consider spanking too much. Wasn't for me growing up, and it did me some good). Wife will be back in the morning, we pick her up from airport, looking forward to it.

I started this blogging stuff with the intent of getting all the crap going on in my head out. Not this daily journal stuff, but the puzzling things, the things that keep me up at night, the things that make me question who I am and why am I here. But none of that's come up so far. Because I don't think about it when I am blogging, I think about it when I can't write about it. Oh well. I guess if I get in the habit of blogging, it will eventually come up. Which is why I write about mundane crap.

I guess it's a start.